After nine years (today) in Hong Kong, tomorrow I leave for Tokyo.

I like the symmetry.

It’s been great that my transition period has coincided with Christmas, New Years and general catch up times with friends as that has made the move not quite so confronting as it blends nicely with these festivities.

I haven’t been having farewells, I’ve been having the usual catch-ups that would normally happen at this time of year and while we all occasionally acknowledge it is the last time that we will each other for a while, this denial has been helpful.

I find it incredibly difficult to say goodbye.

I feel like a piece of me is torn out each time.

It will grow back stronger than before as that’s what happens when wounds heal but it takes time. It’s also not like I’ll never see these people again, it’s just sad for me that I’m not going to be able to see them quite so readily. I’ve been through this before and it will happen again but it still isn’t easy. For me, it’s actually the toughest part of moving country.

It started with my Book Club B*tches (that’s the name we’ve given ourselves so don’t worry, I’m not being insulting) at our Christmas Dinner. One had thoughtfully decided to start a notebook with tips for Japan, books to read while I’m there, things they’ll remember me for and so on. Each then added their own commentary including some photos. This group of women have seen me through one of my toughest times in HK. They may not always read the book they’re meant to, but my life is fuller for having them in it. The conversations are entertaining, sometimes even about the book, their support is unconditional and their tolerance of my book reading obsession is pretty cool too. I’m hoping to continue my membership remotely.

Next was a lunch with my first HK friend, her husband and more than the one other person whose birthday it was the following day (this was all I had been expecting). Unbeknownst to me, she had invited other friends who are currently living in Thailand (they were there for the other birthday party), and quite a few others living in the area too and all the dogs. There was even some cupcakes baked for my dog as her farewell and gifts for her too.

There was a lunch with some former work colleagues whom had been through business expansions, divestitures, various global economic crises and each of our own personal issues with me too. Fabulous seeing this group of people together again and it was a shame that some of our colleagues weren’t able to attend. This group taught me a lot about the way of life in HK for local people. The way they live, think, eat and the history of their country and how they see themselves in relation to China. I had a pretty good manager at that time who still has a laugh when she tells the story of me saying to her that I don’t like change while I was putting together various change initiatives and supporting others through it.

This was followed by my work fancy dress Christmas Dinner and included quite a few chats about my upcoming move. Fun group of people and to end up in LKF with quite a few was entertaining. How could it not be?

As not everyone could make the work dinner, there was a more formal farewell the following Friday that was masked as drinks at a local bar. Gift and card given, speech made, more drinking, denial continued in spite of chatting about my move. This was early in December so there was plenty of time.

Next was Christmas Day which included lunch with my first HK friend looking resplendent in her red coat, beret and shoes. There were clothes on underneath too but that’s not the point. We had an entertaining lunch and then parted ways with tears in our eyes. She is the one that introduced me to a wide circle of people and was the first to not be scared of our dog. Her and her husband were great neighbours, throwing their newspaper over the fence when they finished, dog-sitting at the drop of a hat and introducing us into the HK lifestyle. Her husband rarely fails to crack me up and is a great one to keep me updated on various interesting facts, not all relating to planes. They have been very supportive of me over the years.

New Years followed which was the final time I saw two other friends who also happen to be leaving in the not to distant future so we are all in similar phases of this at the moment.

Last week at work was a series of beverages and lunches. There was hardly anyone in the office and the space felt empty and hollow.

A couple of days ago was my dog. She is staying with my ex while she goes through the quarantine process in HK. This is better as it avoids her being locked up in quarantine for six months in Tokyo. At least she has her freedom in HK while she gets her injections and has the various tests. It’s one of the few times she’s looked back over her shoulder as she left my place and was actually reluctant to walk out the door. She needed coaxing. I cracked.

Yesterday, after the removalists left, I caught up with another former colleague who is also in my book club. Her Mum and Dad were in town and I’ve known them for awhile. We had a meal together at my favourite local restaurant (local as in near to where I live, not HK local food). She is the one that introduced me to the fact that it is possible to have your own jeweller. My life hasn’t been the same since. I enjoy listening to her stories as even if she’s just returning from the gym, the way she tells them, it’s entertaining. She has one of the biggest hearts around, is arty and I always seem to learn something when I spend time with her. Often it has been about some holiday destination I hadn’t even considered. Other times it’s about investments. Others, it’s wine…

Today, I’ve just had a long lunch with another group of people. This particular group are those that I holiday with most frequently. This is the group that step in to help me when I don’t even realise I need help as they see me most often, it’s visible to them. While they may not always laugh at my jokes (there’s no need when I’ll still laugh anyway), they do their best to humour me in their own way and just tease me for this instead. As a group, we work well together, we each have our strengths and these balance against the areas where we’re not so strong. This is a group where I think we can achieve anything we set our minds to.

These people left separately so I was able to be distracted but as it reached the last three, that was becoming difficult.

The first two to leave were the newly weds. I don’t know him that well yet. I do know he loves her like nothing else, has a quirky sense of humour and loves motorcycling. It’s a shame I’m not in HK longer to get to know him better. She has the tendency to schedule herself within an inch of her life and in doing so, reminds me to take it easy. She is an incredibly fit and driven individual and became my dive buddy the weekend following our initial meeting on a junk. It’s one of the 974 things I like about HK, that friendships can be formed like this. She is not a morning person until she has at least one cup of coffee and it had better be strong. While she is highly sensitive, she is stronger than she gives herself credit and probably doesn’t realise that this helps everyone else.

The third has a knack for giving me a kick along when I’m being a bit too stubborn or haven’t considered the full story. It spins her out with some of the things I come out with and while she doesn’t understand where it comes from, she does try to go with it. She’s big on being better herself whether that’s in her work life or her personal life and is single-minded in her pursuit of some tough goals including her fitness. She has been an amazing supporter of pretty well anything I’ve come up with and I really appreciate this. Her love of baking is second only to Nigella Lawson and when I’ve been ill, she’s brought loaves of bread, chicken and beef pre-cooked around for me to reheat. She cares about everyone’s general well being and whether we’ve eaten, slept or anything else enough (or too much!)

The last two left together and one, I won’t see now until March or April. Somehow we’ve remained friends in spite of him thinking I’m a bogan. He’s someone I can clown around with and gets why I find certain things funny, even if he doesn’t. He’s good to bounce ideas off and to help clarify my thoughts. He will have an opinion on just about anything and if not, he’ll come up with one quickly just for the sake of the conversation with no harm generally intended, just for entertainment. He is someone that keeps an eye on how things are going and will give his two cents when needed or when it will gain a few laughs. He is a brilliant planner of holidays and we all know not to go too far down the planning path without checking in with him since he’s likely to have already decided on a few things, researched a few others and had various options as back ups. I love this level of organisation.

Of my lunch buddies today, there’s one I’m seeing again tomorrow that I haven’t said “see you soon” to yet. This is another one from my book club. We’ve holidayed together, we’ve partied together, we’ve HK Sevens together, we’ve cleaned up panda poo together. We’ve spent a lot of time together. She is almost my opposite. But not quite. While she describes herself as Grumpy Bear (she’s a big Care Bears fan) and has decided I’m Funshine Bear (I like that because this bear is yellow), she goes with my silliness at the drop of a hat. She is one of the most caring and considerate people I know. I’ve hardly seen her as grumpy at all which is why I’m not quite sure why she sees herself this way. Our opposites are more that she can’t stand dirt (or panda poo as it turns out), likes tv marathons, will happily watch a chickflick, doesn’t like the idea of running, likes cats (my cat ruined that one for me, it will take me a while to get back onto the cat bandwagon) and takes a little longer than me to see the positive side of things. She’s quirky in a different way to me and has a little dark side that not many people get to hear about, this side is very funny, and very dark! She’s another that has been there for me in a flash when things are not quite all sunshine and roses. That happens even for Funshine Bears but never lasts long.

What I like about all these people, aside from they are a brilliant group, is they are impressive as individuals. Every single one of them is driven. There are no slouches in this group. They are all high achievers. I like it because it encourages me to be better without even realising that I’m being pushed. It seems to happen almost be default.

I have been surrounded by a supportive group of people, some quirky senses of humour and an incredible amount of knowledge (some of it useful, the rest, entertaining). Thanks for all of this and then some! See you soon(ish).

I had the same in Australia. We still see each other too.

Now I’ll build this in Tokyo.

* Thanks to Rodgers & Hammerstein for the title to this post. For those of you who now can’t get The Sound of Music tune out of your head, here’s the clip.